Hamish Smith waves the flag for sports bars at Meatliquor’s new Bloodsports.

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You’re probably wondering why. Why of all the hyped and highminded bars in London to have opened between this magazine and the last, have I settled on the most vacuous bar concept of them all? If sports are the opiates of the masses, the sports bar is a true den of iniquity. But it is in sport’s numbing meaningless that its seduction lies. Like dives, for all their faults, I like sports bars.

Besides, it's worth correcting the misconception that journalists are looking to review ‘good’ venues – we’re actually looking for interesting ones. Something, new, first or different – something to write about. And no press release pitch captured me more than Bloodsports, Meatliquor’s new bar in Covent Garden that is looking to do things differently, with a sideline in blood, guts and cocktails. 

Famously, Bernie Taupin wrote the lyrics before Elton John wrote the music, and I suspect this sports bar concept was fleshed in, not out, when someone came up with its name. It has references to horror – with red lights and décor, framed movie posters, a ‘psychobooth’ for Hitchkock-inspired photos and horror movies on the screens when there’s no sport in this “watching bar concept”. 

The menu, is a veritable abattoir of Meatliqour classics, following the theme through to the drinks – a dozen or so cocktails divided into gorily punned sections. There’s a lot going on outside of the screens too – there’s karaoke, a pool table, arcades and pinball machines. As owner Scott Collins puts it: “It’s a one-stop fun shop.”

HARD DRINKING

Call me conventional, but in the spirit of the tradition of American sports bars, I’m here for the sport, tight-lipped talk and hard drinking. My line-up is assembled: the Boilermaker is a budget-friendly can of Carlsberg and a shot of Few bourbon with a price tag of £7.50 and is called, wittily, Austerity Measures. From the Bloods & Drips section I wade into the Old Fashioned, which is made with Buffalo Trace and cubed ice, and is a good if what-the-fuck-else-wereyou-expecting kind of rendition.

From the slushies I try the Margarita with Pueblo Viejo and the Peach Daiquiri with El Dorado 3 Year Old. Both frozen eruptions, they are tasty and balanced, but just a little too stiff to tease out of the glass. Had I ventured further there could have been forays into Bloody Marys, Largeritas, Micheladas, Negronis and Martinis. Just like at Meatliquor, the burgers are dependably good and the cocktails are thought through. 

It’s about halfway through the second half of a game my team is losing that I look around and realise that mostly people are not looking at the screens. It dawns on me that there are no football shirts and chanting, no borderline bants. People seem to be here for a casual beer and a burger, throwing the odd eye up to the game. The tables around us are chatting – and not about football. What horror is this?

This, deliberately I’m sure, is where the Venn diagram intersects between a regular crowd and the football fans who shout angrily at tiny men in shorts. These are sport’s Sunday Drivers – those who claim to support a team, but don’t know who they’re next playing. I suspect the sports casual demographic is a wider, more lucrative part of the market than we think. To catch them, you need more than sports and fizzy lager. Throw in restaurant-quality food, some very decent cocktails, the games and even a left-field theme and you are giving a lot of different people a lot of reasons to come.

The irony doesn’t escape me that I’m one of them – I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for the hybrid offering of screens, burgers and cocktails. And actually, I liked it. That probably means it’s Bloodsports 1 sports bars 0.

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SCORES

Hospitality 7/10

Drinks 7/10

Food 8/10

Atmosphere 9/10

Décor 7/10

Value 7/10

TOTAL 8/10